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Why do People Cheat?

katt

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This is either for the married or in a relationship - although it's not really the same...sorta, kinda. I, myself would never ever think about doing this to my partner....:finger:

It seems like its a little more "accepted" nowadays. What is your opinion on the subject? Why do you think people do it? Bored? Need variety? Needing that "thrill of lust"? ... have any of you done this? Spill it - inquiring minds want to know!
 
People cheat because they get bored with the same person, or often times have spent too much time with the same person and can barely tolerate them anymore. As far as I am concerned, marriage is an outdated institution that doesn't work anymore.
 
watch "moonstruck"
 
I have gotten drunk and it is very easy from that point. Now that I am married it wont happen, but then again I am smart enough not to put myself in those positions anymore.
 
Same reason you cheat on a diet. You want what you can't have.
 
people cheat because they are spineless. if they weren't why would they take part in a relationship farce? why not just stand up for their true desire to not be obligated to be sexually exclusive? grow a spine, be real and there's no "cheating" involved because you will have let people know you aren't monogamous. :shrug:
 
Lack of direction in one both and either perhaps??

..maybe because either they're not satisfied with the life path or position ( including what it produces asthetically / financially ( ??or professionally and on whaat spiritual moral or sense perhaps?? ) of the other person or because they think theyy and theeir lives are hard work and resoloution of those things slioghtly further out of immediate sight than might look worthwhile to other person and so they do that as a bail excuse in lieu of putting the other person through and gooing through the ..anticipation and pensive trialing b.s. of working throuugh those things through which they might lose them trying to sort out anyway... therefore making it a more superficially solid shot at sommething by just accepting the lower quality gig??..

.. maybe because they don't even really consider themselves tooo be in real and satisifying relationship with the person they're cheating on until they can see plans in action and bearing fruit for xyz or until it all happens in the lives of each.
that's a liittle heady but considering my ex is off screwing hiis ex he nearly married before meeting me ( the onnly two long term relationships he's had at 32 btw - her 8 yrs- me 2) while Ii get some personal situation shit better together to last indefinately more solidly ,.. like I wasn't hot enough beforre I came back for those bits ,:D, so I'm kind of just going with that myself:)...lol.. how fun we arre;) ( shrug)... the gods be honest I guess... it'll pan out or it wont.

Blooming tianshi lotus
 
people cheat because they are spineless. if they weren't why would they take part in a relationship farce? why not just stand up for their true desire to not be obligated to be sexually exclusive? grow a spine, be real and there's no "cheating" involved because you will have let people know you aren't monogamous. :shrug:
I feel there are 2 sides to this.

First of all, you have, as you said, spineless human that do it just for the amusement and because they can't settle in a relationship. Those people are just despicable.

However, I feel there are other people capable of cheating. What about the people that are in failing relationships? I'm not saying cheating is the right answer but many times cheating happens when they are leaning on a friend and during that relationship feelings develop. Or you have the people that cheat to get back at their own cheating partners. I don't know. Just too many variables to me to say everyone is spineless that cheats. Granted, I do feel that if you are in a healthy mindset to cheat, then you really shouldn't be with the person you are with and should break it off before you do so.
 
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I don't cheat because I've been with enough to know all you get is a new set of problems. I went out with many. I got sick of all the drama. I went back to the one of all of them that cause the least drama. I asked her to marry me. : ) As it turns out she was just the best at holding it back. Later I found out she is very explosive when it comes to drama, LOL.
 
I feel there are 2 sides to this.

First of all, you have, as you said, spineless human that do it just for the amusement and because they can't settle in a relationship. Those people are just despicable.

However, I feel there are other people capable of cheating. What about the people that are in failing relationships? I'm not saying cheating is the right answer but many times cheating happens when they are leaning on a friend and during that relationship feelings develop. Or you have the people that cheat to get back at their own cheating partners. I don't know. Just too many variables to me to say everyone is spineless that cheats. Granted, I do feel that if you are in a healthy mindset to cheat, then you really shouldn't be with the person you are with and should break it off before you do so.

A relationship failing is a sad situation and yea I can see how the comfort of a friend could turn into more but hopefully, for everyones sake, one thing ends before another begins. It's very hard sometimes to temper emotion with reason or passion with morals. Guess you just have to choose your partner really carefully and treat them like you'd want to be treated in any given situation. By the time I'm 500 I'll be good at both of those things. :thinking: I hope. :nerd:
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Witchblade
Agreed 110%.

Disagree 120%
[end quote]

I totally missed that comment earlier. While i'm here though,... it is a fact that in the last 20-30 yrs since the birth of the internet and multi - media boom that there has been alot of information that has become available on what has been happening in families and marraiges in the last 50 yrs and more prior that. It is ouur generatations now , and probably most noticable in the late 20 - 30-40 yr old bracket that has been the greatest bulked group product of the afteraftermath of having heard all that stuff.. from the massive divorce stats..of whom were our parents and elder siblings and friends and so on and so forth , to abuse and neglect situations to single parenthood and disfunctional family awareness - of which apparently almost every single family iis in some capacity or other and more pulbicised cultural issues and more international issues that require a sdtance that could make a difference and so the story continues and it's aspects continue to branch into many many smaller and less currently spoken about issues for their relative newness and complicated nature.. riight up to and including education and income and independance and all of these sorts of things that play a role in how well ppl set up lives to facilitate a happy and healthy and successful marraige.. or even relationship withouut marraige... and that's even beforre considering bringing children into the world together..

Hell - .. i know sooo many ppl who are married - with children and without - good jobs and not - flithy rich and dirt poor and somewhere in between and there is no way in hell i would marry under aaany of their circumstances!!..
i do believe though that if someone is fortunate enough to meet someone who is allso aware of those things and each of their own will and insight are prepared to get their owwn shit together to avoid those traps in life that a marraige would work and have the best chance of success it could.. but that is a f*cking big ask and for myself .. if i don't get that.. then.. shrug.. and they have to want to maintain their health and fitness lonng into old age whereever practical outside community project projects which they should have some of also..

.. The saadest part about all that though is most ppl don't even knoww that shit and so they either take aanything they can get under whatever circumstance even when it means they're singing up for a life of shiit, or they get quietly dark and sardonic about it all .. not that I'd personally know what that was like,:D,.. and end up segrogating themselves from any real opportunity of it . What do you do ??.. i know there are ppl here who are married and in relationships, so without trying or wanting to offend those of youu, i think that about as good as we're getting on it, is to each work on our own shit and hopefully by the time we sort it out some one we liike and can work with and be into long term will 've come through and be ready to do likewise.
Until then - well whatever really. if someone's cheating on you and you can be honest, well maybe they are some things that might help to consider. ..as much as it hurts and sucks.

Blooming tianshi lotus.
 
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i was just re-reading this thread and I'm slightly biased being a single mum and i can't say i've not felt like Witchblade and Bigsahm21 for long enough before i met the ex i was talking about in my fist post here.. maybe I'm just using a farse relationship with him to stay out of one.. for that exact reason until I'm better organised if not indefinately. i just want to train really and get my academic and financial goals acheived so with all things considered,.. b.s. isn't it.
Maybe i'll just have to ride it out and let myself know:D .:dont: ;).

Blooming tianshi lotus.
 
Sorry KentDog I guess it might not make sense to homos. Good luck with that.
My reply was to answer the original question made in the first post. However, I should add that I do not cheat. My post "Selfishness" is just my thoughts on the subject.

Also, I love vagina.
 
Same reason you cheat on a diet. You want what you can't have.

I'll carry that analogy a little farther.

Often times people go to restaurants and they order a dish that is new, and they fall in love with that dish. They want to eat it everyday. Well then they don't think ahead, because they judgment is clouded, and they make a legal binding document to only eat that dish every day, for the rest of their life.

After a few years, the person is fucking sick of that dish and hates everything about that dish. One day the person can't take it anymore after seeing a brand new dish that looks so delicious. They cheat, break the deal, and savor the flavor of the new dish.
 
I'll carry that analogy a little farther.

Often times people go to restaurants and they order a dish that is new, and they fall in love with that dish. They want to eat it everyday. Well then they don't think ahead, because they judgment is clouded, and they make a legal binding document to only eat that dish every day, for the rest of their life.

After a few years, the person is fucking sick of that dish and hates everything about that dish. One day the person can't take it anymore after seeing a brand new dish that looks so delicious. They cheat, break the deal, and savor the flavor of the new dish.
Again I agree. You can't eat the same pussy every day. :nut:
 
I'll carry that analogy a little farther.

Often times people go to restaurants and they order a dish that is new, and they fall in love with that dish. They want to eat it everyday. Well then they don't think ahead, because they judgment is clouded, and they make a legal binding document to only eat that dish every day, for the rest of their life.

After a few years, the person is fucking sick of that dish and hates everything about that dish. One day the person can't take it anymore after seeing a brand new dish that looks so delicious. They cheat, break the deal, and savor the flavor of the new dish.

some people enjoy the diversity of life's sexual banquet until one day they wake up and realize that no matter how much of it they eat they are left feeling hollow and hungry. they get really tired of cheap, easy, fast food. then they look for something more satisfying that will nourish body, heart and soul. and not leave blisters on their johnson. :nerd:
 
^^^ latex can be your best friend sometimes
 
^^^ latex can be your best friend sometimes

latex puts a barrier between me and all the best parts of sex. to me it's worth years of celibacy to find that one special partner that i can enjoy fearlessly and completely. latex cannot even begin to compare to the taste, texture or feel of a man.

until you are sure of a partner and their health status you need to treat every encounter as if a person is infected. i wouldn't sleep with a person i knew had anything so to me safer sex is still kinda scary.
 
latex puts a barrier between me and all the best parts of sex. to me it's worth years of celibacy to find that one special partner that i can enjoy fearlessly and completely. latex cannot even begin to compare to the taste, texture or feel of a man.

until you are sure of a partner and their health status you need to treat every encounter as if a person is infected. i wouldn't sleep with a person i knew had anything so to me safer sex is still kinda scary.

reason why i said that is because i chose to wear one rather then risk the chance of std's and getting someone prego. im only 17 i dont need to have a kid at this age and the only person ive ever been with her and i talked about it and both said that i should wear one even though we were both virgins because she didnt want to risk becoming prego.
 
reason why i said that is because i chose to wear one rather then risk the chance of std's and getting someone prego. im only 17 i dont need to have a kid at this age and the only person ive ever been with her and i talked about it and both said that i should wear one even though we were both virgins because she didnt want to risk becoming prego.


they aren't that bad physically but psychologically i used to still be worried despite them so for me they weren't so great.
 
they aren't that bad physically but psychologically i used to still be worried despite them so for me they weren't so great.

just depends on the person i guess it worked for her and i because she was done before i was every time
 
This is no simple answer to this question.
 
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