Woman of Wonder with great Desire

[chiquita6683]

April 20, 2004

Post for Maria! Hi folks what an awesome group!! I am ???Maria the Wonder Woman???s??? Aunt and I call her my Miracle Woman because she has survived and struggled thru the impossible. The Lord wants this young woman to be here with us, we almost lost her twice! She is an inspiration to all who know her or have contact with her. I am visiting from Washington, DC, I saw Maria at Christmas for five days. Wow! Has she grown and changed. She is now able to cook all her own meals shop for food and stay on a much disciplined diet even though we had a peanut butter fudge cycle last night as we walked Chiquita. IT WAS SUGAR-FREE!!! by maria


Maria is displaying more organizing skills A THING U LOOSE AFTER A TBI and is really growing each day toward independence. Her speech is clearer and she is pronouncing words much better. Maria experiences lots of mood swings, she is better able to recognize these and if she hurts another???s feelings she able to later come and say the very hard words. Which we humans all have trouble saying ???I am Sorry???!!
Maria is now able to walk and keep up with the fast moving legs of her dog Chiquita! 4 Months ago she was unable to keep up. Her bodybuilding is awesome and I am so happy to see enjoying the activity I too love the gym and only wish I had started early working on my muscles. I would be so much stronger for the sports I enjoy. I???m also encouraging Maria to swim again she was a state champ before her accidents; she is a fish in the water. I think the Masters team would enjoy her. I am just so proud of Maria I had to Post a note. To all, take care and keep up the good work. Marguerite

 

[chiquita6683]

whoa! i think im kinda understanding what every1 tells me ......finally!

i guess/assume im like this "inspirational icon" and i really touch every1 i come in contact with! this feels really awesome!

like ohmigosh!!! I AM SO AWESOME!!!
ok im getting a big head here, but i cant help it!


now i think of what people have said to me in the past(ive been compared to Lance Armstrong be4 )......n i reread some of ur replys when i 1st made this journal,:

yea im really slow 4 everything to hit me, but it has gotten lil better(than it was).....but i will never just catch rite on to things how i once maybe did.

Today, i was @therapy in my dr's office, Dr. Thomas Murray, "my miracle man", i saw him coming out of a room w a patient, i went kissed him hello n told him he looked great (he had on a nice gray suit, i usually see him in scrubs and a lab coat) he walked me to the room w the HBOT chambers and told me 2 tell the 2student nurses "my story" and said i was his miracle bc of HBOT. i told him i was going to be his poster-child for HBOT, they recently did a commercial or some informational thingee for it.

he usually wouldnt have asked me or i wouldnt have been able to tell it like i did. be4 HE would told it to whoever. I sort of told my story like i did at the beginning of this journal, adding some, didnt say it word4word but i actually remembered it!

i am also a very animated person now(like i was be4 my accidents in a way)
right after i came out of the coma, i barely could make a noise, and I NEVER made a facial xpression, for months, my best friend even told me it was like her best friend had died, I had a different attitude then, sometimes i wished i had died.

last yr at the beach w my aunt, i smiled about something, she said it was so nice to see me smile, she was overjoyed i finally could smile.......i didnt understand, y she missed seeing me smile.

This morning @the gym, i did arms, i actually knew to work triceps first instead of biceps first, i think Kris xplained it was the bigger muscle over n over again like every time we did arms, now its kindof just clicking.
im also like 1 of those hot bb chicks that knows what theyre doing! @the gym.

the whole FITNESS INDUSTRY really really intimidated me be4 bc i was fat n felt stupid and ugly and wished i had died in those accidents(preferably the 1st one),
Now its like I fit in w it!

 

[gwcaton]

Yeah Maria !!!!!

 

[gwcaton]

Good Morning Sweetie !

 

[chiquita6683]

My Battles w Temper Tantrums

Ok I made a post lastnite when this happened but I forgot to do it in word n it didn???t work




I had a busy day yesterday, I spent all morning at the gym, went home ate, didn???t even shower, went to therapy, went in the chamber late so got out late, late4hair apt.
My sister picked me up from therapy and took me 2 her girl, got it highlighted and shaped different??????.made me feel good, I forgot all about asking her to take me to the store bc she told me she needed to go home and go 4 her run n stuff. So I came home and got on my computer ?????????.then @800pm I remembered I didn???t have any meals 4 today. Got my neighbor to take me grocery shopping bc my dad/his gf and my aunt were playing golf still??????started cooking @9ish, everything was going smoothly but I all that cooking/cleaning shit is stressful4me to begin w + it was late, I usually cook in the middle of the day, when no1s home.

When I???m stressed, my attitude gets real short w every1?????????I was in the middle of
cutting up my meat, Everything???s a thinking process for me, I had to concentrate on that. My dad came in to make the coffee and started distracting me.
he asked me all these questions,???y do u have this attitude, what has any1 here done to u???? I not so calmly tried to explain that it was late and cooking/cleaning is stressful. He???s never around, so it???s nice and quiet when I cook/grocery shop usually?????????..he goes something like, ???u ought to enjoy some of this, This is a healthy thing I???m doing but y do u want this when it stresses u out so much??? I told him he doesn???t see me at the gym n stuff, he continued to ask/distract.

After a few minutes, I stormed to my room slammed the door, came out 2 minutes later, stormed back in and was like ???y do u have to be all up in my face asking me questions???? I pointed to scars on my arms, ???I???m cutting up my f__n chicken dad! Do u want me to hurt myself???? I stormed out the back door, (11pm)walked thru my neighborhood, in tank top and boxers, 2 blocks to the river, laid there on the concrete edge. Right across the river is downtown n the stadium and bridges so all the lights reflect on the water, I looked up at the stars 4thirty minutes and I walked back, they???re repaving my street and I was barefooted, but I???m getting a pedicure w my aunt today, that???ll make it feel better.

I got home and my aunt/dad were waiting on me, 1st thing I said was ???I???m not gonna talk about this tonight, so just gone on to bed.??? I started to put my meals up, I guess my brother had finished cutting my chicken 4me, the dishes were done. I told my dad to wipe off the table, I was going to bed.

I haven???t had a tantrum like this in a long time; they???ve gotten a lot better. They use to be over ridiculously stupid little things, and I would slap/hit my dad, throw dining room chairs around, slam doors repeatedly. It wasn???t very good on my mom???s nerves, she was sick. I feel bad now when I think about how I treated her, but I was in a different stage of recovery then.

 

[chiquita6683]

stressful weekend...........ok i made that postabout thursday nite, friday, i dont remember, Saturday.........i signed up for CPR class along time ago bc i thought i was gonna be a personal trainer but i doubt i can remember all the muscles. i get lost in the gym 1/2 the time, how am i spose2 bring some1 else through a workout?
it was long and boring, it was my 1st test ive taken(besides medically) since my 2nd accident........the class was adult/child/infant/first aid. it came time for the first test, i was totally Freaking out! the teacher saw me n my facial expression, n led me to another room, i told her i was nervous, and told my story, she asked the dates and was really understanding. i was bawling those were the hardest 10-15 questions. its not that i couldnt remember, i was distracted by the thought of a TEST. i think i really am kinda smart.
She took me to lunch, since i said id have to getta cab n we talked alot. she said shes amazed @me, she works w patients w tbi all the time, shes a trauma nurse or something. i only missed 1 on all the tests. i feel so stupid i made a big deal out of a really easy thing.

sorry most of my posts r so dramatic, i feel alil embarrassed when i read em. i usually write them right after whatever happens n it seems that much worse right then, like that last post. i made a post right after this happened, luckily it didnt work. u gotta remember, EVERYTHINGS a thinking process

this is a journal, im just venting my feelings at the moment
i come back later n read it, n say "wow that was dumb, no wonder no1 responded." altho i think that sometimes, u dont know what to say

 

[chiquita6683]

o yea! Sunday.....imy sister took me on a shopping trip to orlando my
we had some bonding "sister" talks on the drive down. it was nice. i needed alot of new clothes since i lost all the weight i did, and im goin on that big trip! i love my sister! shes my personal fashion coordinator, i cant pick anything out anymore! im like "whatever"

it was soo nice, to fit in regular sized clothes again! everytime i pass by Lane Bryant, now. ithink "ha! i used to wear plus-sized clothes!"
im so cocky now..........in the dressing room, my sister was handing me the clothes to try on and hanging em up, she would laugh at me everytime i put something on and struck a pose.

omg my diet has been terrible! i didnt cook anything this weekend!
i went to the cheesecake factory! had a pesto chicken pizza, and a whole peice of heathbar coffee cheesecake which had a ton of REAL whipped cream! omg it was so good! but i cooked again today.

but i forgot to do cardio

 

[chiquita6683]

Wonder Woman's no drama journal......ok maybe a lil

OK, I am so Over Myself!

I go back and read the old posts in my other journal and u guys are really supportive but if u get to know the Real me, I am so NOT like how I sounded! I guess bc everything is a thinking process, at least until I get used to it??????..but its like that For Everyone right? I probably seemed like a Drama Queen and then some??????I usually wrote the posts like right after whatever would happen, and so id sound like all stressed out but whatever it was, really WAS NOT a big deal. You people deal with it all the time. I am not special!

Bodybuilders /(people that have competed) are no better than any1else, at least not in the kind of way I thought u were! but bc that goal seemed so impossible for Me to achieve (and still sometimes does) I would try that much harder! Bodybuilding is a hard thing for everyone!

Not Every Bodybuilder cooks ALL their food! But Kris did, my old trainer(she competes) so I thought i had2, if i didnt i would never be able to compete if i didnt! Grocery shopping gets expensive! And cooking is a hard task! That???s right, 4 everyone! So my diet???s gonna be lil worse mmmmmmmmm

 

[chiquita6683]

ok i made another journal w that last post, but i think im just gonna stick w this 1

 

[gwcaton]

 

[Monolith]

 

[chiquita6683]

i just puked my protein pancakes an hr ago, i think thats all it was..........bad eggwhites, im scheduled w Bill tonite @6or630. im wondering how ill feel, ill go anyways to talk to him, hes leaving tomorrow for a trip hes gotta take for work for 2months.

 

[chiquita6683]

had2 go to the ER lastnite, dehydrated, had dry heaves ect.
my diets been liquids n crackers all day, im ready for real food! told bill i would stay outa the gym till at least monday
i feel so weak!

last time i went to the ER i was fat, i wasnt self concious or anything when the cute dr had to listen to my lungs on the back open gown or touch my abdomen it feels so nice to be in shape!

 

[gwcaton]

Hi Sweetheart !

You take care of yourself. But i must say that you must be feeling pretty good even though you were in the ERif you had the presence of mind to check out the cute Dr. !

Have a good weekend !

 

[chiquita6683]

baby u know how much of a flirt i am! never missa stud

 

[chiquita6683]

posted a new pic

 

[chiquita6683]

My diet has been so shitty! ive only had 1 protein shake ever since i can have whole foods. i ordered a thin crust cheese pizza tonite
be4 i got sick my diet was super freaky clean, almost, im not in the mood to cook anything either
my trainings gonna suk next week 2

 

[gwcaton]

Originally posted by chiquita6683
baby u know how much of a flirt i am! never missa stud

LMAO !!!! You are amazing.

 

[Sapphire]

 

[chiquita6683]

Originally posted by gwcaton
LMAO !!!! You are amazing.

o and y is that so funny?

hey saphire! how u doin gurly?!

 

[gwcaton]

Originally posted by chiquita6683
o and y is that so funny?

hey saphire! how u doin gurly?!

Maria, I can just picture the doc examining you and you "examing" him !!!! The doc was a lucky guy have a gorgeous young lady like you checking him out !

 

[chiquita6683]

lmao! thats so sweet its funny, so true!
goodnite!

 

[chiquita6683]

mmm i never tried it this way
i made a protein shake, vanilla muscle provider, 4 cubesa ice, lil cran-grape juice, lil diet sierra mist

 

[chiquita6683]

yea i havent figured out how to link people to a different thread but i posted this in the training forum under a thread started by flex whining/bitching about his right/left side being unsymmetrical to his other 1....
this is what i said......

Post #7

yea, every1s bigger/stronger on 1 side! ur all freaks!!!! u no what?! this is just a huge pile of horse shit!!!! no even worse!

i was right handed be4 my accidents, i had to learn how to use my left hand!i had to write for sschool to finish my senior yr!

and THEN during my goal assessments w my trainers, they were like yea yea everybody has a side thats weaker naturally



id try to explain to them, that right after my 1st accident...i felt like i had a stroke or something! the hand was dead weight! and i had to learn to write w it!!!!
i use to dread chest workouts w my 1st trainer bc when i had to do flat db press my right side would be soo hard to get my right arm up and straighten my elbow!

gawd damn its like no1 understands!

sorry i had 2 vent some here, damnit life is so unfair! read my jounal to see y im bitching


sorry flex u werent whining or bitching. but im venting here!

 

[Mudge]

Re: oh yea! btw~

Originally posted by chiquita6683
somebody needs to tell me that i can do this or that im on the rite track

You're doing great.

 

[chiquita6683]

thanx mudge!
anyway up in that post i posted in the training forum there were alot of these faces.........

so i think im going to bed now, pissed at the world, again......but what else is new

 

[chiquita6683]

Re: Re: oh yea! btw~

Originally posted by Mudge
You're doing great.

mudge was oyea btw~ in this journal or another forum?

 

[greekblondechic]

Originally posted by chiquita6683
but now its like quit checkin me out, im here to getta workout in...

you're such a funny girl chiqy!

 

[gwcaton]

Good Morning Gorgeous !

Give 'em hell girl !

 

[atherjen]

Hows your weekend going Chiq?