Now on a different note...
Does my kid know how to play with his hose or what??
Does my kid know how to play with his hose or what??
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Diary of a madman.....
- Thread starter Pitboss
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I can tell you right now PB. That is exactely how i felt up until 2 monthes ago. I have been with my man for 4 years (not nearly as long as you were with the Mrs.) and the same thoughts occur in my mind. The reason they do is because we (you and i) were both too careless about sex in the past. Well for me anyways, i still have a hard time expressing feelings of love through sex, rather than it being just a fun game to play. I am just learning now how to make love. I think you may need to do the same thing. It definately takes alot of time and patience from both people, but it will be worth it in the end. I believe if this isnt corrected then this prob will keep on happening.
Thats right, no attraction no go. Its just a fact.
With her gaining that much weight, i can completely see what happended. Although you love the person you may have a hard time relating to them. Sometimes it grouses me out to see my BF eating junk because i am scared he will become over weight. it really isnt that you arent attracted to them anymore its that you dont see eye to eye on health and you most likely dont do the physical things you used to do when she was smaller.
Your right you can only do so much. She obviously did not want it bad enough. Maybe she should have come to IM. You may want to introduce it to her, and just say that you have fun and think she would have fun on here and maybe learn from some people. You never really tend to take the advice from a loved one as much as from a stranger (well sometimes).
She definately has to do it for her self and not for you.
Sounds like she needs to know how a healthy lifestyle feels.
Thats right, no attraction no go. Its just a fact.
With her gaining that much weight, i can completely see what happended. Although you love the person you may have a hard time relating to them. Sometimes it grouses me out to see my BF eating junk because i am scared he will become over weight. it really isnt that you arent attracted to them anymore its that you dont see eye to eye on health and you most likely dont do the physical things you used to do when she was smaller.
Your right you can only do so much. She obviously did not want it bad enough. Maybe she should have come to IM. You may want to introduce it to her, and just say that you have fun and think she would have fun on here and maybe learn from some people. You never really tend to take the advice from a loved one as much as from a stranger (well sometimes).
She definately has to do it for her self and not for you.
Sounds like she needs to know how a healthy lifestyle feels.
I introduced her to MuscleMag last year.... bad mistake. All my online flirting was right there in front of her to read and see... and her constant stalking my every post to comment on "I'm his wife" and being a little overly uhm don't know the words...
anyhow.. She has her life and she is eating better and going to the gym. Has a "man" friend training with her. Which I'm really am glad to hear
and you are soooooo right. I can put as much passion into "sex" as I can and it stills come out as sex to me. I don't know if it's the actually act or an emotion that really makes the difference. I guess the hair pulling and the biting on the shoulder doesn't help much either...
But no I do understand where you are coming from with this. Not really sure what it will take for me to get to that point where I can seperate the two. Or even if I ever will.......
and you never did respond to a post in another thread...
"you would rather give than recieve?"
Well here is my veiw on that subject.
After years with someone it does get old, it does lose it's spice. You can only do so much, between the two of you, to add spice and change into the bedroom.
But there comes a time when you have to believe that your love for one another and your ongoing friendship is enough to continue on. You have to set aside your selfishness, your lust, and any other emotions that can disctract you from actually loving your spouse.
There is a point when sex is a memory like college and family and future is the important issues. Companionship for a lifetime versus companionship for an hour.
... yeah that's my veiwpoint and opinion and it's something I will probably never really have.
After years with someone it does get old, it does lose it's spice. You can only do so much, between the two of you, to add spice and change into the bedroom.
But there comes a time when you have to believe that your love for one another and your ongoing friendship is enough to continue on. You have to set aside your selfishness, your lust, and any other emotions that can disctract you from actually loving your spouse.
There is a point when sex is a memory like college and family and future is the important issues. Companionship for a lifetime versus companionship for an hour.
... yeah that's my veiwpoint and opinion and it's something I will probably never really have.
Oh..
I'm so sorry to hear about your and yoru wifes loses. My mother went through 5 miscarriages after me... Guess that was God's way of telling her one of me was more than enough for anyone to handle!!!!
But as a young child I was able to see and understand how these loses effected her. You may want to consider trying to get your wife to a therapist... she is more than likely thinking there is somethign wrong with her and that she is at fault. Until she gets over that she will take a very, very long time to heal on her own and probably add even more stress to your marriage.
I'm so sorry to hear about your and yoru wifes loses. My mother went through 5 miscarriages after me... Guess that was God's way of telling her one of me was more than enough for anyone to handle!!!!
But as a young child I was able to see and understand how these loses effected her. You may want to consider trying to get your wife to a therapist... she is more than likely thinking there is somethign wrong with her and that she is at fault. Until she gets over that she will take a very, very long time to heal on her own and probably add even more stress to your marriage.
Thanks PB. You know one thing I have learned through the years we've been married is like I said earlier...The grass is always greener on the other side........Even though I think it gets old, there is no one I'd rather be with! I been with plenty of women and yeah it's great the first time or two, but you know what, it's the same!!! A &*##% is a &*##%!! it would all get old and boring once you get used to it! I agree with ya.....it's the friendship, commitment and trust that makes a marriage work. Sex is just one part of it!! And like J'bo said, you have to work at that, to keep it fun!! Me and my wife always pick at each other because we've been together so long we know what each other thinks and what we are going to say! And my values and ideas in life have rubbed off on her!! Ever been with a woman that totally believes different from you in politics and religion?? Used to be I didn't care. But now it's a turn off!! Hell, let's face it man! We're growing older and getting wiser!! Ain't that a bitch!!!!
WOW! PB I think this thread should be changed to "Pour Your Heart Out" I sat here reading all of this and I wanted to tell you guys that it is the same for women as well.
A year ago I left my husband and moved to the midwest.
We started dating when we were 19 and got married when we were 27. Was married a whole 2 years. I didn't want to have sex with him anymore! My sex drive was still definately there but not for him. He is an attractive guy. He even started working out with me and eating right a few years back but I still didn't want him. I use to get so excited whenever he or I would have to go away on business trips. I use to be a workaholic cause I didn't want to go home.
So anyway, the moral of my story is that now I realized how wrong I was and how much I miss him. If any of you ever read my journal you would have read that I am moving back home. My divorce has not gone through yet and my husband and I have decided that we are going to try and work things out. That, and I miss my sisters and dog so damn much! Now, I don't want to get too personal but my sex drive is still plenty there, but I am worried. I don't want it to become what it use to be like where I didn't want to have sex with him anymore. I enjoy it way to much and I am afraid I might make a mistake again. I am hoping that the love that we have for each other will get us through and that we realize that were together. We've been together for 11 years and there has to be a reason for that, I am just hoping I will find it?
OK, enough of this gushy stuff. Just wanted to let you know it happens to all of us!
A year ago I left my husband and moved to the midwest.
We started dating when we were 19 and got married when we were 27. Was married a whole 2 years. I didn't want to have sex with him anymore! My sex drive was still definately there but not for him. He is an attractive guy. He even started working out with me and eating right a few years back but I still didn't want him. I use to get so excited whenever he or I would have to go away on business trips. I use to be a workaholic cause I didn't want to go home.
So anyway, the moral of my story is that now I realized how wrong I was and how much I miss him. If any of you ever read my journal you would have read that I am moving back home. My divorce has not gone through yet and my husband and I have decided that we are going to try and work things out. That, and I miss my sisters and dog so damn much! Now, I don't want to get too personal but my sex drive is still plenty there, but I am worried. I don't want it to become what it use to be like where I didn't want to have sex with him anymore. I enjoy it way to much and I am afraid I might make a mistake again. I am hoping that the love that we have for each other will get us through and that we realize that were together. We've been together for 11 years and there has to be a reason for that, I am just hoping I will find it?
OK, enough of this gushy stuff. Just wanted to let you know it happens to all of us!
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Mochy, I know this is PB's thread but thanks for the post! Hell we all make mistakes, we're human! And no one is perfect!! I feel just like you do with the sex drive thing. Is love that you have for each other enough to get you through it?? I don't know the answer to that! Wish I did. I sure could make a lot of money if I did!!! I do know one thing...You miss him! That's says something. Maybe you were both young and thought it would be better on the other side...and like I said......mostly it's not!! Maybe things will be different now!! Maybe not. But it sure is worth a try!!! At least you will know!!
P.S. That's why we are here...to help each other out!!
P.S. That's why we are here...to help each other out!!
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* giggle * ... then there are freaks like us who have found a very unconventional way to keep things spiced up.
NT...I'll have to admit, you and mrs. NT are two of a kind!!!!!!!
Dude I hope you have a great vacation coming up!! But don't forget.....PLENTY OF PICS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dude I hope you have a great vacation coming up!! But don't forget.....PLENTY OF PICS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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PB knows ... 
Originally posted by naturaltan
PB knows ...
Do as the Romans do!!!
Mochy.. I really appreciate your openess. It takes a lot for someone to talk abotu such personal issues with basically strangers... maybe that's what makes it so easy for me.
I think it's great that you two are going to try to work things out. It shows a lot when people have been through what you have and still decide that there is enough love and friendship not to call it quits. People makes mistakes and as long you both know that there is remorse for those actions then it can work out... me I'd ask my wife what took her so long to cheat on me and then ask for details... but I'm a perv like that.. LOL
Expect some magic at first.. you know those butterflies you get like a new love has entered your life. They will fade quicker than a new relationship but you have to get past that part and remember what it was that kept you together for so long and what brought you back together again.... Good luck sweetie...
Still think you need to post those pics you keep hinding from me!!
I think it's great that you two are going to try to work things out. It shows a lot when people have been through what you have and still decide that there is enough love and friendship not to call it quits. People makes mistakes and as long you both know that there is remorse for those actions then it can work out... me I'd ask my wife what took her so long to cheat on me and then ask for details... but I'm a perv like that.. LOL
Expect some magic at first.. you know those butterflies you get like a new love has entered your life. They will fade quicker than a new relationship but you have to get past that part and remember what it was that kept you together for so long and what brought you back together again.... Good luck sweetie...
Still think you need to post those pics you keep hinding from me!!
Mmm huh!!!!!!!!!
Originally posted by naturaltan
* giggle * ... then there are freaks like us who have found a very unconventional way to keep things spiced up.
It is funny you use the word freak LMFAO that is one of my favorite words. I use it on me because of all of my tats and piercings. I LOVE that word and I use it lovingly LOL...seriously, I do!! I don't call the weirdos freaks because it is tooooo good for them!
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then yourself, PB and I can affectionately call ourselves freaks
Originally posted by naturaltan
then yourself, PB and I can affectionately call ourselves freaks
Well I'm still looking for that "freakette'!!!!!!! Cause I do know what I want.. how i want it and it's all just totally freaky!!!!!
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then yourself, PB and I can affectionately call ourselves freaks
damn nothing about those pics... he he
Thansk sweetie.. only time will tell and we only have one life to live. Can't always make the right choices but we can at least try to make the ones that we think will make us the happiest.
Originally posted by Pitboss
.. only time will tell and we only have one life to live. Can't always make the right choices but we can at least try to make the ones that we think will make us the happiest.
Had to put that in quotes.... still trying to figure out who wrote that?????
Okay so my mind is decided.. after a few days of agony, restleness, attmepts to be non-pornal.. which is like asking Woody Allen to be 6 foot tall, good looking and funny.... NOT GONNA HAPPEN!!!.....
I'm calling it quits with Amanda. We talked on the phone breifly and I ageed that I would come over tonight to hang out, watch a movie for a little bit... she knows, you can hear it her voice. But she has always known. She has been making it easier for me and telling me not to worry about her, she'll be okay and not to decide to stay together because I'm afraid of hurting her.. She is a very special person.
I also don't want to lose her in my life and I want her to know that. Even if that means no sex, just friends... I can do that, I think.... okay I can try to do that. I mean who knows maybe down the road things will be different and I'll be ready to really commit. I'd much rather have her around and there than not.. makes sense?? I'm not going to play head games with here.. I'm not going to push sex on her or say things that make her think I'm coming around soon. Just friends.. occassionally hang out.
Now for the second time in less than a year I'll make that promise again to myself... never again will a break a womans heart. Never again will I allow myself to be put into something I am not happy with.
..... there. Now I can concentrate on my diary just being a bunch a daily boring crap in my life.
Hmmmmm PB's single again... uh oh!!!!!!!!!
Yes, you being a single main is a scary thought!
Do you like my new sig?
Do you like my new sig?
Not scary... exciting!!!!
I like the sig.. sorry I couldn't stay for long. It's hard to sit next to you and not have pornal thoughts.. I told you a dozen times your blouse had come unbuttoned but you wouldn't believe me.. oh wait that was something else I was thinking about with you in it..
Hey PB, what's up?????
Long time no talk lol, how's things going with you.. or , do I wanna know.. hehe
Long time no talk
lol, how's things going with you.. or , do I wanna know.. hehe
Originally posted by Scorpio Gurl
Hey PB, what's up?????
Long time no talk
How's my gurl??? Miss ya bunches honey
Well if start at the start of this thread I'm okay.. then not, then i am, and not, am, not, am... I think that's where i am at now.. LOL
Email me.. update me!!
Originally posted by J'Bo
PB,
Good to hear you made some decisions.
Make sure there is no nooky going on during the movie w/ Amanda. It better not be a porno.
At this time I have no intentions of staying over.. just talking and hanging out. However it would be rather rude of me to turn down her advances wouldn't it?? And she picked the movie not me!!!!
You gonna put that in your signature? Sounds good!
LOL, J'Bo, about the movie not being a porno one!!!
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